Death Scenes (And my love hate relationship with them)

Since I'm back from the lovely writing workshop I suppose I'd better blog about what I've learned I'm good at. You know, my greatest strengths in writing. I have a lot of weaknesses too but there are a few things that just flow more easily onto the page when I type.

One of those things is death scenes.

Ah, death scenes. How I both love and despise you. What is it about you that makes me such a time bomb of emotional instability?

Well it's the reader and writer at war inside me of course. The reader in me is screaming, "HOW COULD YOU?! YOU ARE A TERRIBLE HUMAN BEING AND YOU DON'T DESERVE TO LIVE!" But the writer is saying, "Good, good! Make your readers cry! Squeeze every drop of depressing you possibly can out of these words. Dance puppets, dance!"

This is all going on at the same time while I write death scenes. I can't help but feel both self hatred and joy when I write because I am good at death scenes. I don't know what that says about me as a person but I'm good at making people cry.

So this year at the workshop I decided to try an experiment. I met a friend while I was there who was very empathetic and easily prone to tears. She cried at everything... well not everything... but she got easily invested in characters so when it came time for them to die she was sobbing. It was a kind of empathy that I really admired in her (Being a cold, heartless, cynic myself)

So I decided to try an experiment. I had written a death scene for my current project that was undoubtedly the saddest thing I ever wrote. It was so brutal I was crying when I wrote it and I don't really cry at books. So I wanted to take this scene that my friend had no prior emotional investment in and see if she would cry.

She did. Hard. And she screamed at me. Even though she didn't know this character. And I couldn't stop smiling because, well, SUCCESS!

Now, that's just my empathetic friend but imagine if she had been with these characters for four books. The reaction would be much more intense.

It's interesting that this is my talent because I've never witnessed death. The people I've known who have died I haven't been particularly close to. I don't know what it's like to feel that empty and can't right from experience. I just create it in my head somehow. I imagine the feeling. According to people who have read my stuff I'm pretty close.

Death scenes are also difficult for me to write in an emotional sense because I always seem to kill off my favorite characters. In fact in my top ten characters for my book every single one of them dies, almost dies or is psychologically tortured. Or sometimes more than one of these. It's just because I love them that much I guess.

What are your strengths in writing? What scenes come the easiest to you?

-Authoress Anonymous

Creative explosions (What happens in a void of creativity)

So I've been gone for the past... oh... three weeks. I didn't intend for that to happen at all. I was fully planning on updating at least every two days. Clearly that didn't happen.

You see for the last three weeks I have been entrapped in a void where time and space have no meaning; a void where reality doesn't exist. I was at a two week long creative writing workshop and then at a close friend's house for the next four days. I just got in last night.

In this workshop, which shall remain nameless in hopes of protecting my identity (An endeavor that I doubt will succeed for long), about fifty five aspiring writers were split into five groups of eleven. The first week we created our very own fantasy world together. And I mean the whole thing. Religion, species, gods, environment, cultures, politics, economy, fashion. Everything all in one week. And it's not like we were locked in to our groups either. When we weren't in our groups we were listening to lectures by visiting writers, eating meals and talking non stop with each other, taking trips to the local book store etc. And of course we were writing in our spare time.

In the second week, we began writing our short stories. They had to be 3,500 to 8,000 words. Which may seem like plenty of room but in two days, I hit 9,200 words and I had to cut 1,200 words out of my story. Exactly that amount. In the end my work was exactly 8,000 words.

The short stories were then critiqued in a few days by the visiting authors and we got some wonderful feedback on our strengths and weakness. I made so many wonderful and true friends there that I was very sad to leave. It's a good sign when you feel like you've known the people for months rather than days.

So, as you can see, I was in a creativity void, in which I am often prone to creative explosions. I pumped out over 9,000 words in two days which is much faster than my usual rate. Everyone else thought I was psycho too.

"So how much do you have so far?"

"Oh I just broke the minimum."

"I've got 4,000 now!"

"Oh that's good! What about you?"

"I have 9,200."

"...Seriously?"

"...Yeah..."

Usually I'm more of a 2,000 words a day kind of girl but that's what this workshop does to me.

My point is, workshops are wonderful opportunities. Opportunities to form lifelong relationships, opportunities to connect on what you love to do (Because even though a lot of us are quiet, when someone is listening to us we love to babble on and on) and an opportunity to really let yourself go. You can't worry about outside distractions so you just write.

It's definitely worth the money.

-Authoress Anonymous